In our time to time interactions with moms over various platforms, we accidentally touched upon the topic of how some women are feeling left out of their own pregnancy and/ or their journey of new motherhood!! Over the course of many such small chit chats we realised that this feeling amongst the pregnant moms and new moms is highly prevalent and so many just feel it but have never voiced it.
Now we all have heard about postpartum depression. This topic while similar is a bit different – a topic if not discussed and awareness not spread could lead to atleast symptoms of postpartum depression emerging if not suffered fully.
So what is it that we are dealing with here? What are our pregnant or new moms experiencing? Well simply put it a loss of identity for themselves!
They are being pampered keeping the baby in mind : not because the mom needs pampering too. Which she must!! After all she is experiencing crazy changes emotionally, physically and mentally, which scare her and have her thrown off-gear. How much ever one is told about it or read on it, when it hits, most woman are unprepared.
The pregnancy hormones tend to wreak havoc on the woman’s body. Apart from coping with the changing body shape and increased weight gain, many women are suddenly hit with various ailments which they didn’t have earlier - ranging from blood pressure, iron deficiencies, gestational diabetes, thyroid etc and for some ailments which lead to requiring weeks of complete bed rest. Imagine that!!! Emotionally it’s a roller coaster state of mind and heart. All these ailments continue well into post pregnancy early post baby delivery days too. Add to that the numerous restrictions imposed with regard to her eating, drinking, movement and even the TV she can watch or the music she must listen too. With all of this pressure on her & expectation from her (for a happy healthy delivery and baby) and then not talking to the mama about her feelings or creating a cheery environment for her can really be detrimental to her mental state of happiness.
It must be recognised, this phase isn’t just about the baby is it? All understand the baby brings excitement and needs to be tended to with lots of TLC, but then again we all aware of the saying about the village being there to raise a baby. Who takes care of mama’s wellbeing? In her pregnancy and later as a new mom? Not her alone ofcourse!! Ever heard of Happy Mama = Happy Baby?
Ofcourse, there is the excitement of bringing a new life into the world .. however that doesn’t in anyway undermine the mom as a person. Pregnancy & new mommyhood is a beautiful phase, so when celebrating it do celebrate the mom too. After all she’s the reason for the new life!
So if you know a pregnant or new mom, then do ask her how SHE is doing? How is SHE feeling? Ask her what SHE would like to do or eat without it always being about the baby (ofcourse she understands the realms within which she will do all these things).
Gift her a surprise when shopping for the new born however small it may be. Something which tells her she is special- she is celebrated!! Any thoughts?
Some easy tips to help celebrate the mom:
Now we all have heard about postpartum depression. This topic while similar is a bit different – a topic if not discussed and awareness not spread could lead to atleast symptoms of postpartum depression emerging if not suffered fully.
So what is it that we are dealing with here? What are our pregnant or new moms experiencing? Well simply put it a loss of identity for themselves!
They are being pampered keeping the baby in mind : not because the mom needs pampering too. Which she must!! After all she is experiencing crazy changes emotionally, physically and mentally, which scare her and have her thrown off-gear. How much ever one is told about it or read on it, when it hits, most woman are unprepared.
The pregnancy hormones tend to wreak havoc on the woman’s body. Apart from coping with the changing body shape and increased weight gain, many women are suddenly hit with various ailments which they didn’t have earlier - ranging from blood pressure, iron deficiencies, gestational diabetes, thyroid etc and for some ailments which lead to requiring weeks of complete bed rest. Imagine that!!! Emotionally it’s a roller coaster state of mind and heart. All these ailments continue well into post pregnancy early post baby delivery days too. Add to that the numerous restrictions imposed with regard to her eating, drinking, movement and even the TV she can watch or the music she must listen too. With all of this pressure on her & expectation from her (for a happy healthy delivery and baby) and then not talking to the mama about her feelings or creating a cheery environment for her can really be detrimental to her mental state of happiness.
It must be recognised, this phase isn’t just about the baby is it? All understand the baby brings excitement and needs to be tended to with lots of TLC, but then again we all aware of the saying about the village being there to raise a baby. Who takes care of mama’s wellbeing? In her pregnancy and later as a new mom? Not her alone ofcourse!! Ever heard of Happy Mama = Happy Baby?
Ofcourse, there is the excitement of bringing a new life into the world .. however that doesn’t in anyway undermine the mom as a person. Pregnancy & new mommyhood is a beautiful phase, so when celebrating it do celebrate the mom too. After all she’s the reason for the new life!
So if you know a pregnant or new mom, then do ask her how SHE is doing? How is SHE feeling? Ask her what SHE would like to do or eat without it always being about the baby (ofcourse she understands the realms within which she will do all these things).
Gift her a surprise when shopping for the new born however small it may be. Something which tells her she is special- she is celebrated!! Any thoughts?
Some easy tips to help celebrate the mom:
- Have her a Meal of her “choice”: be it take out or go dine out
- Book a spa day or parlour day: these days the spa/ parlour come home making it simpler for everyone
- Surprise her with her favourite chocolate or Ice-Cream flavour or a dessert she craves
- Movie outing
- Ensure the Baby Shower is about her too!!
- Give her the “time” to doll up even if it’s to just sit home – a very simple yet easy one! Trust us on this one! 😊
- Shopping: an instant mood lifter for anyone, especially if shopping for self.
Leave a comment